Monday, 5 September 2011

Play your legitimate roles!

Things likes this would not have happened if husband & wife know their responsibilities & roles that they should do in a marriage.

All these while, I read this happening in the magazines .Magazines that always features this kind of articles are Mingguan Wanita.. Thus I can’t believe it when it happened to people I know..

In Islam, a husband main roles, duties & responsibilities are to provide everything, from A to Z for his family. This including providing a maid if he can afford one la.. And it is encouraged & ok for any wife to share & spend any amount of her own money for the well being of her family.. Meaning, a wife are given free option to share her money to buy food & pay for it for her family needs. But it’s not a right given to husband to demand for this from his wife..

Thus, if there is a mutual understanding between husband & wife on their legitimate roles to play, the marriage will be smooth sailing when it comes to spending money for the sakes of the family well being..

Even in other religion too this concept is widely known..I mean both husband & wife should shouldered the same responsibilities in their marriage..

But when a husband especially forget his roles & responsibilities, that is when a harmony marriage turns to be unharmonious one..

I just could not understand why a husband does not want to pay for the family food and other utilities too… The weirdest part is when the husband expect and even asked the wife to find a new job that can offer a higher salaries.. Shouldn’t it be the husband’s roles to find more money for his family? It is good enough that his wife is working too and willing to pay for food & utilities.. But asking her to get a new job is just too much la…

Want to know why this is happening? Based on stories that these ladies shared to me is that these husbands get too complacent once their supportive & kind hearted wives pay all the food & utilities bills… At the early stage of the marriage, these wives were eager & happy to help out with households finances.. And there are husband too that give monthly allowance to his wife to settle all the bills…

But things started to change for worst when these husbands started taking these things for granted… Suddenly the monthly allowance is stopped and the wife has to fork out everything from her own salary… Does not matter if the wife’s salary is lower or higher than the husband’s salary..It is still the husband’s roles & responsibilities to pay some or all for the house expenses..

More pity when this involved the well being of their small innocent children… Don’t these husbands want to give the best education for their own flesh & blood?

I get headache (slightly) when I think of these marriage illness… Sometimes I looked back to ones’ religion faith… I always believe a good knowledge of religion will help to shape one’s personalities & characters. Faith & religion will help to curb these marriage illnesses from happening…

I looked back at level of faith & religions of these husbands have…Sad to say that is NIL…

Again I hate it when people get too cosy & complacent of ideas & concepts of marriage.. I know in general, people like to use this concept of “just go with the flow” for their marriage. They apply this to husband & wife relationship. They even apply this concept when raising up their kids.. When it comes to kids, that is why we will see these obese kids due to poor eating habits low nutrition, kids with poor behavior who does not know to salam , respect others, kids who does not know how to behave in other people’s houses etc…More pity when these kids are not guided in their educations..


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